


Gone

by justlikedaylightsavingstime



Series: Supernatural Pairing Bingo [6]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dark fic, It's fairly dark, Jim's mind and personality have been completely twisted, M/M, Nothing explicit, hints of romatic attachment, mostly it's about what's going on in Jim's head, no explicit descriptions of violence, not smut, so take care, spn pairing bingo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-03
Updated: 2015-01-03
Packaged: 2018-03-05 01:32:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3100064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justlikedaylightsavingstime/pseuds/justlikedaylightsavingstime
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jim has long since lost the ability to be useful to Azazel. It’s only a matter of time before he’s disposed of, but for some reason Azazel keeps postponing the inevitable.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Gone

**Author's Note:**

> Title: Gone  
> Pairing: Jim Murphy/Azazel  
> Type: Captor/Captive, hints at some form of emotional dependency  
> Rating: R  
> Word Count: 539  
> Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or any related character.  
> Summary: Jim has long since lost the ability to be useful to Azazel. It’s only a matter of time before he’s disposed of, but for some reason Azazel keeps postponing the inevitable.  
> Warnings: Dark fic. No sexual content, but it’s pretty dark as Jim’s mind and personality has been completely eradicated during his incarceration. References to violence, but no graphic depictions.
> 
> So I was trying something new out with this, and I feel like it ended up being a little pretentious. But feel free to let me know what you think. I will just say, heed the warnings as it could be seen as being fairly dark and I don't want anyone to read something that'll upset them. As always feedback/criticism/comments/requests/prompts are extremely welcome.

Written for the [2014 spn pairing bingo](http://spnpairingbingo.livejournal.com/).  
You can also read this on my [LJ account](http://roastspud.livejournal.com/6947.html).

***

Empty. Quiet. Dark. Pain. Silence. Fear. Scream. Yell. Cry. Metal. Hard. Cold. Blood. More. Less. Lonely. Lost. Gone. Crack. Bang. Slap. Shot. Whip. Searing. Burning. Fire. Inferno. Endless. Frozen. Shiver. Tremble. Clatter. Clang. Stench. Waste. Wet. Drip. Splash. Naked. Light. Bright. Blinding. Dark.

That is all he knows now. Nothing else. Nothing more, and unfortunately nothing less. The whip was bad, the blade was worse. But it was the silence which truly got him. The days on his own. Master Azazel is in no rush. He can wait for centuries. And so he will have to too. Until his master finally gets what he needs. It has been many months since he can even remember what that was.

At least he still knows his name. Master Azazel uses it sometimes, as if to taunt, to tease. Jim. Apparently Jim had people. Knew things. The words just spin around him, incoherent and empty. He had long stopped wondering what they stood for. He no longer has any desire to know who John was, or Dean, or Sam, or Bobby. Names. Taunts. Insults. It all means nothing.

Apparently Jim had had a rosary, he still holds it clutched in his fist sometimes. It doesn’t feel right, offers no comfort, only pain when hard wooden beads angrily dug into abused flesh. But Master Azazel had given them to him. Or let him keep them. He isn’t even sure any more. But he must keep them. He knows they were for God, a chance to connect to heaven. Master Azazel said that he had known God once, had loved him, had served him. It must be true if Master Azazel said it, but he could not recall a memory from the words.

Master Azazel laughs and want him to keep the rosary, says it will remind him that Master is the only one here, that God can’t change anything. He already knows this. He doesn’t know why Azazel thinks he needs the reminder. God has never been here, not in this silence. This silence is for him, and more importantly for his master. Master Azazel is here, smiling and poking and hurting. No necklace can change that.

He sits quietly, holding the beads because he is supposed to. He doesn’t know why he is here. Has no idea why. He remembers Master Azazel asking for answers, demanding them with words and whips and knives. But he can’t remember the questions, and they would be meaningless if he could. He is useless. Soon Master Azazel will grow weary, and he will throw him out, or kill him. Master Azazel tells him this again and again. But Master has yet to do it. No answers will ever slip from these lips. They simply don’t exist, and both of the creatures in this room know that. It is only a matter of time, and then there will be no choice.

He hears things. Things from the monsters that lurk beyond his prison. They ask why he isn’t dead yet. Master only growls in reply. Master doesn’t understand either. But soon they will all realise how useless he is. Soon he will be gone, no more rosary, no more wet or cold, no more burning yellow eyes.

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me at justlikedaylightsavingstime.tumblr.com :)


End file.
